Hey little girl, wake up.
I hope I’ll wake up one day from this nightmare, and run in my mother’s arms crying ‘cause of how scared I was while telling her about it.
I miss when the sight of my eyes draws colors to the view that I wake up to. I can't help but mourn for it, though I'm aware that I could never go back to how it used to be. But if I had one wish, I would wanna walk to the road back to my childhood home.
It’s not just nostalgia anymore, it’s a feeling of grief. Grieving for the childhood I once had that I would never get a glimpse of, ever again. I have tried to recreate the memories over again, but the feeling isn’t the same.
Is this a dream? if so, please wake me up.
This is a nightmare. How do I wake myself up? All I remember before this nightmare was me, the little girl, I played with my friends and felt the cold breeze in the air; the air of peace, the feeling of not having to worry about anything. Then, I went home, ran to my parents. I would say I was a silly little girl for sneaking out food on the kitchen table just to eat it with my friends. I remember my mom called me, telling me to go back home. I went home sweaty, but those sweats were only my body reacting to so much fun and joy before coming home. "Take an afternoon sleep", my mom said, and so I did. I took a peaceful nap, hearing the loud fan infront of me, feeling the air of peace. I fell asleep. Am I still asleep?
Please do wake me up, I can't take this nightmare anymore. It's terrible, it's horrible, it's vile. I hate it here. Please, little girl, wake up. We've never planned growing up, yet here we are. Wake up, little girl, your friends are waiting for you outside to play. I wonder if mom cooked us dinner already; how I wish I could taste it, the dinner she made with love, the dinner that she made for us, not caring if she doesn't eat, she thought of us more than herself.
Please wake me up, I wanna taste mom's dinner.
Why am I so big now? Why am I in a body of a grown girl? I'm supposed to be a little girl. I'm not used to this, I'm not used to anything at all. Why are the sweats in this body all came from the tiredness? No, this can't be. I sweat because of the fun I felt playing outside with my friends, not because of the pressure I'm feeling from everything else. I used to cry because of the wound I got when I fell down the swing, but why am I crying now because of a boy? because of my friends? because of my school? because of my family? Why am I crying because of everything that's happening? Am I not the little girl they used to take care of anymore? Do I not deserve to be taken care of anymore?
I feel so alone, so so alone. I can't handle being a grown up anymore, I can't handle anything at all. Let me go back to my old little self. Let me be little again. Let me be taken care of, again. Wake me up from this nightmare, please.
Wake the little girl up that's sleeping on my bed. Wake me up.
